The Secret
by LanzellxLala
Summary: Jessie has a secret. Well, at least she thinks she does. She has been self harming and thinks she has hid it well, but little does she know, that James knows. What's gonna happen? Read to find out. Will contain a strong sex scene later on and mentions of suicide. POSSIBLITY IS HIGH OF CONTAINING A SUICIDE ATTEMPT. MAY BE TRIGGERING
1. Slice and Dice

Disclaimer - I do not own Pokémon. I wish I did but unfortunately I do not. :(

AN - If you've come back or whatever I do apologise for all the page break line size crap that was here before. IDK what happened there. The site glitched on me as I was uploading. But as you can see I have now fixed it :) Sorry again :)

**The Secret**

**Chapter 1: ****Slice and Dice**

Jessie just laid there, staring at the roof of the cave wishing it would crash down on top of her. She just wanted the pain to end. She could feel the urge coming again. She had to get out of there and fast. She knew that once again she wasn't going to beat it; yet another failure. She rolled onto her side to see her two companions James and Meowth sound asleep. Meowth's front paws kicking in the air as if he were playing with a ball of yarn and James mumbling about the mountains of food and riches he was surrounded by. "At least they're happy" Jessie sighed, her voice shaking as she was on the verge of tears. She grabbed a small bag out of her larger bag and snuck out of the cave. Once she was out she made a run for it, crying incredibly hard the whole way. Soon she came to a lake and collapsed in a heap, crying so hard she could barely breathe. Eventually she sat up, wiping the tears from her face before they were quickly replaced by more. She opened the bag to reveal all sorts of bits and bobs; Matches, razor blades, a pocket knife and even a lighter. She stared at the objects in the bag; a feeling of hatred growing quickly in her heart, but also a feeling of dependence. She removed her left glove to reveal her left arm covered in scars from burns and cuts, as well as bruising from where she had been squeezing her arm or hitting it against things when she couldn't cut or burn. She pulled a razor blade out of the bag and put it to her arm. "I hate you" she whispered before slicing the blade across her skin again and again. For that moment she was blind, she just kept cutting and cutting. She did eventually stop and open her eyes, looking at her arm and the many deep cuts each releasing blood. "GOD DAMNIT I HATE YOU!" she cried before slicing herself one last time, this one was much, much deeper than the others but not so deep that she would need a hospital. She threw the blade back into the bag wincing in pain as blood dripped from the gashes in her arm. She slowly and painfully slipped her glove back on, cursing while doing so. She dipped an old rag into the lake and used it to wash her face. She slipped the rag into the bag and made her way back to the cave. Before she snuck back into the cave she quietly cleared her throat and tried to smile with her eyes, in case Meowth or James woke up and asked where she had been. She quietly slipped over to her larger bag and placed the smaller bag inside it, before climbing back into her sleeping bag; Sighing heavily as she finally fell asleep. However in all her anger she had made a mistake.

"The next morning Jessie was the first one up. Seeing that Meowth and James were still asleep she removed her left glove, cursing as quietly as she could as she did so. She had put it on before the cuts had stopped bleeding and as a result the glove had stuck to her arm. Taking it off had caused most of the cuts to rip open, causing her a lot of pain. She pulled some old rags out of her bag and started to clean the wounds. She didn't know it yet, but James had heard her cursing and woken up. He had watched her remove her glove and had seen the state her arm was in. He was shocked. Jessie was in so much pain and he hadn't even realised. He felt awful. He knew he had to find a way to 'accidentally' find out. He knew if Jessie caught him snooping into her personal life she would be furious and when Jessie got furious, she got scary. Little did he know that Jessie was going to accidentally show him very, very soon. In all of Jessie's anger the night before she had forgotten to clean the blood off the blade and was too preoccupied with her arm to do it that morning. That mistake was going to cost her big time.

AN - What do you think so far? Let me know what you think should happen next or later on. If I like the idea I will try and add it into the story :) More to come soon, Please review x


	2. Not Worth It

Disclaimer: I do not own Pokémon.

**The Secret**  
**Chapter 2: Not Worth It**

By the time lunch time had come around James still had no luck with coming up with a plan. What disappointed him even more was that it was lunch time... 3 weeks later. Nearly a month and he still hadn't figured out how to help Jessie. He was really getting into a time crunch now. She was now crying herself to sleep at night. James could only imagine what she was thinking. He hoped to get some time alone with Jessie really soon. It didn't take long for him to get his chance, Meowth left to get more supplies, while James went to help Jessie with the dishes.  
"Jess..." James started nervously.  
"What do you want James?" Jessie retorted somewhat angrily.  
"Are you ok?" He asked, worry evident in his voice.  
"James suddenly noticed just how hard Jessie was scrubbing the dishes.  
"Why the worried tone James? Everything is fine. I've never been better. Everything is just..." she stopped when she dropped a plate.  
"Jessie was quick to let out a growl.  
"EVERYTHING IS JUST FINE!" She screamed extremely angrily as she set to work rewashing the plate.  
"James then made the ballsy decision to take the plate from Jessie's hands. For the first time since he had come over, Jessie made eye contact with James. She glared at him so angrily he felt as if he was about to burst into flames.  
"What... the fuck... are you doing James!" She snarled.  
"Jessie, stop this please!" James said firmly, confused as to where this sudden boost of confidence had come.  
"He took her by the hand and led her over to a tree. Once comfortable under the tree, he tried to look her in the eye, but Jessie wasn't going to give him the chance. She just kept looking at the ground.  
"Jessie, what's going on? Something is clearly upsetting you. Please tell me what's wrong." James pleaded.  
"No James" Jessie began. "Nothing is wrong. Like I told you before, I've never been better." She continued. 'it's sweet of you to ask but I'm fine." She finished.  
"Then why" James pushed.  
"Why what?" Jessie asked, trying to sound confused, even though she knew exactly what James was talking about.  
"Why do you cry yourself to sleep at night? Why do you sneak off at night? Why have I often seen you tending to unexplainable cuts on your arms and legs?" James questioned.  
"I'm just... I'm just going through some things right now, ok" Jessie stated trying not to cry.  
"It looks like more than just things" James continued to push. "And what's this?" He asked as he placed his hand on her shoulder and tried to get a look at the long rope like bruise on her neck but she smacked him away before he could.  
"Would you just leave it!" She stood up and glared at James. "I'm not worth helping"  
James leapt to his feet and took a hold of Jessie's hands.  
"Of course you are Jessie" James started. He tried to say more but she cut him off.  
"NO! I'M NOT WORTH HELPING OK! WILL YOU PLEASE JUST DROP IT!" Jessie snapped. "PLEASE!" She snarled as she turned on her heel and went back to washing the dishes.  
James was really worried now. Even he, a man who was usually incredibly thick headed, knew how she got that bruise. Jessie had tried to hang herself and with a bruise that fresh, it had happened recently. Jessie wasn't just self harming like he originally thought. She was suicidal, and the thought of himself finding Jessie dead scared the shit out of him. James knew he had to do something fast, or he was going to lose her.  
"I won't stop" He said to himself. "I have to help her."  
AN - Second chapter done. What do you think should happen next? Please review x


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